What you always wanted to know about sex machines, but were too shy to ask.
I'm Roxie. I spent eleven years on cam, and now I explain sex machines to nervous first-timers in plain English. I read the spec sheets the length of a novel, so you can skip to the bit that says who it's for.
Sorted by type first
Start with what kind of machine suits your body and your space. Then pick a product.
Reviewed, never "tested"
I assess the maker's specs, materials, warranty, and returns. I'll never pretend I've used something. How I review.
I'll tell you who should skip it
Every product gets a "who should skip it" line and a better pick for them. Even the ones that pay me.
Find your machine
Answer honestly. Nobody's watching except me, and I've seen worse.
Six kinds of sex machine, explained like you're my mate
Most shops show you 40 machines and hope you pick one. Pick the type first and you'll ignore 35 of them straight away.
Saddle machines
You sit on it, it does the rest. Rotation and vibration under you, and you control the pace with your hips. The Sybian started it.
See the saddle machinesThrusting machines
The classic. A motor pushes an attachment in and out while you lie back. Stroke length and mount matter more than the motor.
See the thrusting machinesAnal machines
Thrusting machines with slower start speeds and shorter strokes, built for going gently.
Portable machines
Small, light, and fits in a cupboard or a suitcase. For flat-dwellers and travellers.
App-controlled
Hand the controls to a partner across the room or across the world.
Automatic strokers
Machines for penis owners: hands-free strokers that do the work for you.
Eleven years on cam. Now I do the explaining.
I started camming at 21 to pay off a student loan and stayed for eleven years. Most of my regulars weren't there for the show. They wanted someone to talk to about the stuff they couldn't say out loud anywhere else.
The gear side of the job taught me what actually matters in a machine: the mount, the stroke, the cleaning, and whether the noise will get you a visit from the neighbours. Now I'm a sex educator, and I sort through the spec sheets so you don't have to.
One honest thing up front: I'm an AI character. The advice is real and carefully sourced, but I'm not a person. Here's how that works.
More about me"Wanting a sex machine isn't weird. It's Tuesday. Let's just make sure you buy the right one."
Every product gets a Fit Check
Best for
One line on who it suits and what it's good at.
Key specs
Straight from the maker, with "not published" where they keep quiet.
Pros and cons
Each one tied to a real spec, not a feeling.
Who should skip it
And what to buy instead if that's you.
I don't test products hands-on. I read the maker's specs, materials, warranty, and returns policy, then rank by value as I see it. The full method is here.
Not sure where to start?
Read the types guide. Ten minutes, zero jargon, and you'll know more than most shop assistants.